Why It’s Important to Recognize Stepmoms on Mother’s Day

Mother’s Day can be tough for blended families. We have my stepkids 50/50, so they spend half of their time with us. When they are here, I take on half of the parenting role. Just as I do as a mother, as a stepmom, I help support them financially, I take them to school, I clean up after them, I participate in school and extracurricular activities, I buy their favorite snacks, and cook them healthy meals.

Stepmoms have it tough.

We aren’t always fully appreciated for what we do–not just from our husbands and stepkids, but also from our family, in-laws, and friends. It can be discouraging because we love these kids so much. If you are a stepmom whose heart aches on Mother’s Day, gets caught up in your Facebook newsfeed, feels unappreciated, and becomes lost in emotions of sadness and jealousy…

I’ve been there.

It’s easy for people to forget about us, the stepmoms, on Mother’s Day. For many of us the person who is there to give us recognition is our husband. Even if your stepkids are old enough to call on their own or buy a card, it may not cross their mind to do so. This day has always been meant for their mother and is a day they probably spend with her (as they should). So, if your stepkids aren’t celebrating you, it’s probably because their mom, dad, or teachers aren’t necessarily advising them to do so. It’s likely not because they don’t feel it’s important, it’s just that to the outside world, we are easily overlooked.

But remember, the lack of recognition on Mother’s Day is not a reflection of your stepkids’ love and affection for you.

I was a stepmom before I became a mother. Some of my first experiences as a parent came from moments with my stepson and stepdaughter. I have always loved them like my own. The days aren’t always easy, and there are times I feel envious or even lonely within my own family. But I know I have strong relationships with my stepkids, I love them deeply, and I know that they love me.

This is why it’s important to recognize a stepmom.

It’s important because we love our stepkids. We care for them. We cheer for them. We support them. We are proud of them. We pray for them. And we want the absolute best for them.

When my stepkids aren’t with us, it feels like part of our family is missing…because it is. I miss them just like a parent misses their child, because I AM a parent missing their child.

They are my children. They are my family.

Why It's Important to Recognize Stepmoms on Mother's Day

If you are a stepmom who is disheartened on Mother’s Day, I know how you feel. My heart aches on this day with you. Just know that your stepkids love you, they appreciate you, and they will someday recognize everything you have done for them. Your unconditional love is one of the best gifts that they will receive. 

P.S. If you have a stepmom, if you are married to a stepmom, or if you know a stepmom: give her a hug, give her a phone call, or simply tell her thank you. She deserves it.


Chelsie lives in Durant with her Fiancé, Joe, their Daughter (1), Stepson (7), and Stepdaughter (5). She grew up in Northeast Iowa making her way to Iowa City to attend the University of Iowa were she earned her B.F.A. in Graphic Design. She currently works at Phelps Uniform Specialists in Muscatine as the Design and Marketing Coordinator. When she isn’t spending quality time with her family, she likes to enjoy some of her favorites including: watching Hawkeye Football (and Packers!), reading lots and lots of books, drinking all the coffee, camping, running, and finding new outlets to be creative.


  1. Why do step”whatever” are always trying to steal a role that don’t have any right to claim?

    Stepmothers aren’t mothers! Will never be!

    Make your own children and make them give gifts to you!

    • Wow, what a miserable bitch. Someone is very jealous that another woman can actually care for someone else’s child and be good at it. Jealousy is not a good thing!! May God bless your face no wonder you’re the ex lol.

    • What if the mother is deceased and due to health issues the stepmother is unable to have their own children. Or their husband doesn’t want any more children?

  2. Absolutely should celebrate them on Mother’s Day! Us Step moms aren’t trying to take away a special day from the bio mom but a small part of the day would be nice. I’m a step mom and bio mom. I halve always recognized my kids step mom and feel they should at least do something with their step mom for some part of that day! All of you don’t understand that are very inconsiderate.

  3. Wow I can’t believe these comments” make your own children ” unfortunately I can’t it won’t ever happen for me. Don’t understand why everyone else can but me, but for some reason God decide it wasn’t in his plan. I totally relate to the article cause im a step mom and totally see the unappreciation we recive, were not even acknowledged and still do all the roles as a nonbiological parent for our step kids. Helping them financially, transporting them to practices, watching and supporting them at their events being there for them etc. Making sure they have everything they need to succeed in life. Sometimes alittle acknowledgement is all thats needed and goes along way. Totally relate and thank you for writing this

  4. If I knew step parenting was like this I would’ve never signed up. I treat them kids with love and respect. These kids are unappreciated and entitled. I celebrate these KIDS birthday up until they were old enough to ask for money, I’m not celebrating their birthday if they aren’t celebrating mine. Fuck those kids and ask your dad n mom.


Please enter your comment!
Please enter your name here

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.