Just like everyone, I have good days and bad days during quarantine. One night in particular, I found myself sitting on our couch crying while my hubby put the kids to bed. It was sadness mixed with anger.
This isn’t how I pictured it.
Last summer, not long after you told us about your husband’s job opportunity in Ohio, we had a play date at Centennial Park and we watched a mutual friend end her play date with a tearful good bye. She was moving.
She and her friend hugged a long time before they said good bye. Your move wasn’t official yet, your husband hadn’t even been offered the job yet, but I knew in my heart of hearts that soon, that would be us. Your hubby would get the job and we would have one last play date and cry on each other’s shoulders.
Only that’s not how it happened.
We spent your last three months in Iowa apart. You were two doors down but social distancing and quarantine meant we hardly saw each other.
Before COVID-19, I pictured how your last few weeks would be.
I pictured a big dinner on a patio with all of our gym friends. Lots of laughter, lots of drinks, and good food.
I pictured our last playgroup. Where we soaked it all in watching our kids, who have known each other since they were babies, play together one last time.
I pictured our last gauntlet together at the gym. And our last kickboxing workout. Our last drive to and from the gym together.
None of these events happened like I pictured them because the lasts happened and we didn’t even realize they were our lasts.
So, as I cried on the couch that night, all of the sadness washed over me and the anger I felt for having missed out on many lasts just boiled over. When the tears stopped I realized that maybe this is just setting us up for the rest of our friendship. It won’t be how I pictured it.
I pictured our kids going to school together forever.
I pictured sitting on each others decks and commiserating during the teenage years.
I pictured all of our kids always having each other’s backs as school.
Our friendship going forward won’t look how I pictured it, but that’s OK because we will always be besties. You will always be the neighbor we had when our house was struck by lightning and caught on fire. You will always be the mama who went through the good and the bad and the firsts of parenting for seven years. COVID can’t take that away.
Even though the future of our friendship isn’t how I pictured it would be, I can’t wait to see where it takes us!