Changing Your Dating Routine: 3 Rules For Spicing Up Your Dates

We all hear about the honeymoon stage in a relationship. We go through it during the early stages of dating, it’s rekindled after the engagement, and then we see that blissful time once again when we say the “I dos.” Fast forward a few years and a few kids later, and you find yourself in the comfort zone.

There’s nothing wrong with being part of the comfort club. It’s cozy! It’s familiar, and most importantly, it’s easy. Add the Midwestern January-to-March blues and you will find yourself constantly nestled up on the couch watching the series “This is Us” in your favorite hoodie and fuzzy socks.

Total comfort zone = total bliss. Perhaps…

tips for spicing up your dating routine date night ideas

Don’t get me wrong–I do get the occasional night out with the hubby. But if your relationship is like ours, you often find yourself venturing to the same restaurants and following it up with a movie at the theater. Does this ring a bell?

I was starting to see a common trend and began my search for a much needed spruce-up. After seven years of marriage, my husband and I found ourselves falling too much into a routine. There was nothing bad about our routine, and our marriage certainly wasn’t in any trouble. It was more a mindset of, “It’s easier staying in,” or, “Why the need to go out?”

A coworker of my husband’s once talked about the five-year “comfort zone.” Whether this is pure speculation on her behalf or true among many couples, I will never know. But I began thinking to myself, “Dear God, we need a marital face lift!”

That’s when we decided to spice things up!

No, I’m not talking about in the bedroom. I’m talking about dating–not for the sake of just going out, but actually making the dating part fun again.

We followed three rules to spice up our dating game, and we found they helped tremendously to set some guidelines and let the magic happen. Give them a shot!

tips for spicing up your dating routine date night ideas

3 Rules For Spicing Up Your Dates

1. Choose a new and adventurous place.

Don’t keep going to the same old places. Try an international cuisine where you’re sampling a new food for the first time together, or schedule an evening at a local escape room. Hit up a comedy club for some laughs, or a see a live band. Bond over a game of laser tag, a wine and painting workshop/class, or bowling. Be brave, and have fun!

2. No cell phones allowed.

This means no texting, internet surfing, checking your social media, or anything else. Leave the phones in the car, or at least turn them off. Look at each other’s faces, not your glowing screen.

3. No photo documenting.

We don’t need to show the Facebook world that we’re on a date. We just need each other. Take the time to appreciate what’s going on in real time, and of course the person across from you.

That’s it! Who would have thought that something so simple as these three rules could bring us out of our boring old routine?!  Of course I am not the love doctor, and these three rules might not be the ones for you to follow. However, if you sense that five-year comfort zone approaching, perhaps think about what unique dating adventures you and your significant other can work up to fit your needs. 

With Valentine’s Day soon approaching, it would be a great opportunity to get out of your cozy corner and add a little spice to your date night.  


Mary, a native of Rockford, Illinois, attended DePaul University in Chicago, Illinois where she received her BA in Secondary Art Education. In 2007, she moved to Cedar Rapids, Iowa after accepting a position as a high school visual arts teacher with the Cedar Rapids Community School District. She and her husband, Collin, who is a teacher in the Iowa City Community School District, reside in Cedar Rapids with their daughters, Zoey and Munroe. Zoey is five and Munroe will be turning one in October 2016. In addition to being a full time mommy, full time teacher, and writer for the mom’s blog, she is also a professional artist who has shown and published works both nationally and internationally. Mary enjoys traveling, painting, and most of all, spending time with her family.


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